Although, Something is coming, it will rock the foundations of all sciences.

Be prepared.

Also, Lagamuffin is a cunt.

I recently read a book regarding genitals, It was rather good, despite it's plot I found the science behind rather enlightening. But nothing prepares you more for genitals than a good 'ball job'.

But it's hard to tug the folicles on my balls when you ugly cunts are gazing at me like some garden school of Robins. Gay Robins no doubt, but us Professors are a kinky lot and don't hesistate to rub peach segments on your balls then ejaculate in your hair. It comes naturally with a visit from any Professor. However, don't hold your breath, as us Professor's are very picky regarding our bait.

So if you want a taste of golden, 18 inch Professor dick, then shut the fuck up you remedial cunts.
That is all for now, if any other Professor cares to add to this rather sentual, bodaciously bastardised post, then don't hesitate to do so.

Yours truly, DumbassDude - Professor Of Chemisty

ATTENTION PROFESSORS
The new sigs are out, ask EvilJesus for them. (Still need work)

Hello you jealous Newgrounds peasants, sitting there with your small hands around your small, wrinkly bastard cocks, dreaming of the day you will be asked to join our sexy department of Sciences... Well guess what, KEEP DREAMING, no more places, we have already filled the slots with the most delightfully witty and loud mouthed cunts ever to grace NG. TOUGH LUCK SONNY.

--Left 4 Dead Collab--
Anyway, now to gracefully stroll to the main section of this news post. The Left 4 Dead Collab, since the majority of us professors have this game, I think it's about time we express our love for this game through the art of motion and animation (flash). All professors shall take part, whether it be animation, voice acting or helping another professor think of ideas. Remember, we have no deadline as of yet because we shall discuss this as a group.
Here are the specifications...

--Specifications--
550 x 400 pixels
25 FPS
White Background Colour
Anything badass and sexy is allowed, but fuck am I allowing sprites of any sort.

Levels
No Mercy - DumbassDude
Death Toll - Dibsy (Not a professor, stamp of approval nonetheless)
Dead Air - Available
Blood Harvest - SCUD14

NOTE: Any one capable of making a sexy rap beat plus PM this account, as we the professors are going to create a masterpeice, and it won't be professor masterpiece without a professor rap.
Will co-author, there is plenty of room!

--My cure for cancer, squandered--
Now that flash is out of the way, the professors have been working long keeping the Newgrounds community stable from every angle and side of the community, we do our best. Recently, just yesterday infact while I was eating my strawberries and listening to my Barry Manilow album, my beeper went off to alert me my project was finished. I ran into the laboratory to find pure essence of carbon juroxide infl'matory powder, in fucking NG retard terms, a cure for cancer. We all gathered round the powder, and took turns sniffing it up, we were tripping balls until early this morning. I don't remember how I made the compound because I used the results to roll up a dooby.
So long story short, I created a cure for cancer, and wasted it.

We have a new professor in our ranks, 16/3/09, Burnzoid. Treat him like everyone else in the Professor ranks, like a much more important and sexier person than everyone else who is not a professor.

I also had chicken and peas.

So here's the lowdown, fellows. The professors are an elite bunch of anus creaming faggots hellbent on having a jolly old giggle with eachother. We enjoy activities such as anal sex, swinging but mostly playing games over Xbox Live.

Convinced already? Please read on. If not, there will be a section at the end of the post just for you.

If you would like to join our fantastically orgasmic brilliant bastard of a group, then you can apply, but there are a few things that will be necessary to your joining of our group. If you don't have them, you're a cunt - fuck off.

Here they are:

Xbox Live with a headset and online games.
At least 16 years under yer belt.
A cock with at least 8 inches.

Okay so that's Professorism. It's sort of like Communism only six times the fun.

The Professorist Movement? It's a dance. It's similar to the chicken dance, only you must have mutton chops!.

My day was rate good, I had ice cream and beans.

Also, for the cunts that weren't interested, you can get fucked. Don't let me see you near my turf again, do you dig, man?

You do?
GLEE!

GOOD NEWS EVERYONE!

P.S: Black Flame does not have access to this account.
P.S.S.: EvilJesus was here.
P.S.S.S.: DumbassDude was here.
EvilJesus has a dancing routine too you know.

This has nothing to do with Americans, in fact, it's to do with something.